It's the Small Stuff That Counts

Last week was refreshing - a stop and consider type of refreshing. The kind that realigns your heart and mind, allowing your perspective to broaden. First, I realized I have only two weeks of the college semester left, that I've essentially made it to the end! All that crazy almost done. Hard to believe, but such a relief.

Then my son had a sleep over birthday party. I set a limited number of 12 year old boys who could crash at my house, but my husband said "No, invite them all." When I bulked (I don't "do" bigger groups of younger kids well) he said he'd take over the party. And that he did. I made sure the party had what it needed and hung out for happy birthday, then split. (Yes, I came back and spent the night listening to nonstop chatter except between the hours of 3am-6am, so I didn't totally abandon my husband to the mob!) But what a husband. Knowing I have limits to what I can take with a huge group of crazy younger kids, he was more than willing to take over and let me escape for the craziest part of it.

And escape I did, thanks to one of my best friends answering my picture and rhetorical question on IG about needing to escape the number of running, noisy bodies in my house. Hang out time and a movie and just a really nice night. It is rare to find people you can completely be yourself around. I have foot in mouth disease - the bad combination of a big mouth and a strong-will - so it's refreshing to find someone who knows who I am and I don't have to replay the night in worry later.

The weekend was also shared with a family friend who comes by once a week to watch movies with us. He owns over 2,000 movies and we've currently been binge watching our way through seasons of Survivor. We've been at it for 18 months now and we're on season 23...that's 11 1/2 years of Survivor! It's always a great night when he is with us - we usually eat dinner or have snacks and cheer or yell as needed at competitions that are years gone. Lol.

And the moments that started the refreshing of these past couple days were with my students. My Seniors, the majority of whom were my Juniors last year, started presenting their "Things That Happened to Me" slideshows last Thursday and finish up tomorrow. Based on Oskar Schell's photo book of the same name in Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, I asked them to choose a combination 20 pictures of their own and internet that show me who they are. I don't think I've enjoyed any other project as much.

Can't put up my students' pictures,
but this is where we meet.

My Seniors told me where they've been and where they're going; what they've failed and what they've accomplished; what makes them laugh and what makes them cry; who they love and who loves them; how the world has changed them and how they want to change the world; how they're broken and how they've healed. They've shared their families, friends, pets, jobs, favorite colors, hobbies, interests, secrets, and dozens of little things in between. I've enjoyed every word of every presentation the past two days. How could I not?

According to the state of Pennsylvania they're my job, but to me, they're simply my kids. And soon enough, after two years in my classroom, they'll be graduating. So this week, for now, I am going to enjoy my time with them and all they're willing to share.

Yes, we have work to do, friendships have tough times, my kids and their friends can be a crazy bunch, my husband and I may not always be so mindful of each other, and my current journey is CRAZY, but it's the day-to-day where life happens - memories are made, lessons are learned, and lives are fortified.

It's the small stuff that counts.

Begin the Week with Words

I've said numerous times in reviewing her books, her blog posts, and her quotes, that I love Ann Voskamp. So it shouldn't be surprising that I'm bringing her around again for Sunday Sentence. Some quotes here from her blog post on friendship.


"What can ever be more of a priority than a person?"

"Friendships never just happen — they are forged."

"To be a friend that curves her heart into this safe cup for all words and feelings to spill,  the good and the grit, the grain and the chaff all mixed. Then in faithful silence to always sift for the good — and with a whispering prayer — blow all the grit that chafes away with a breath of grace."

Begin the Week with Words

Life is tough - that's not news to anyone. What was news to me at one point is how hard it is to find people to depend upon for the ins and outs of life. A friend sent this excerpt yesterday, thinking of me, and it warmed my heart. I hope everyone has such a friend thinking of them!

"An amazing few friends dive into our mess with us, help us sort it out, and make us feel safe in the process. It’s why God meant for us to have people to travel with in life—to be His hands and feet on earth and help each other both thrive and endure." I Want God, by Lisa Whittle

Begin the Week with Words

This week's quote is an excerpt from a daily devotional I receive by email, Wisdom Hunters. This is only a piece of the bigger topic discussed (full post here), but I like it because it's how I feel about relationships. Different levels for different types of relationships, of course, but the sentiment remains - show people they are loved.

"When we love someone, we live our lives in ways that show our affection to be true and genuine. We are especially attentive to the needs, concerns, and desires of the one we love. We learn to receive love and love in return, not simply by words of affection but through tangible acts of love, self-sacrifice, and faithfulness." 

Heart Sisters: Be the Friend You Want to Have

Source: Amazon.com

Well, the summer months have not ceased to throw stones, so to speak, but there have been moments and events in between the crazy to buoy my spirit and I'm thankful for that. Mostly, it's been fun and conversation with family and close friends that has uplifted me. What would we do without friends? And yet, friendship is a tough topic. If you've been around my blog for a longer period of time, you'll know I've spent the past couple of years seeking wisdom on the making of good, healthy friendships. There's nothing I've longed for more than a couple close friends who know me absolutely and in whose friendship I am confident. I've read and reviewed books of every related topic possible. So, I was very excited when a friend brought the Christian title Heart Sisters, by Natalie Chambers Snapp, to my attention.

Snapp's term Heart Sisters is defined as "the women you want to be around during your own major milestones. They will hold you up when you’re falling but will also rejoice with you when there’s rejoicing to be done." Looking at the Table of Contents alone presents Snapp's book as one that will discuss the hardest things about being a friend and how to handle them in the best way possible. She tackles topics such as:

Handling conflict

Setting boundaries

Digital Etiquette

What Heart Sisters do and don't do

Seems intense, maybe. But think of all the issues and regrets that have popped up in friendships. Plus, Snapp isn't talking about just any friendship, she's talking about the closest of friends. We all have circles of friends, who vary in closeness. Snapp's book refers to that small, intimate grouping of women who "we need to share in our laughter. Sometimes we need a good cry with a sister by our side. Other times, we need her to carry us because we simply don’t think we can put one foot in front of the other on our own. We need Heart Sisters" (emphasis mine).

This is among the best books on friendship I've read, as the advice is applicable to forming all kinds of friendships. I've always dreamed of having close friends, but comparing real life to the movie versions, doubted it was possible. Heart Sisters not only shows close friendship is possible, but gives the healthy, realistic parameters in which to form them. 

Ignoring My Goodreads Goal

Every January I look forward to setting a new Goodreads reading goal for the year. And every year I strive to complete the goal, missing by a book or two a year or so and making it others. It gets annoying here and there because I end up picking some reads based on how they will help me add another tally to my goal keeping. And yet, I love the idea of a challenge, tracking books, and reading more than I did the year before.

But not this year.

I set a goal, but for the first time, I've decided to ignore my Goodreads goal. I'll add books as I go, but I'm not going to strive to make it. For those of you involved in yearly reading challenges, I know you understand the internal conflict this causes a bibliophile (the rest of you can feel free to laugh at me). As I started to think about doing this, more reasons popped up, making it easier and easier.

1. I fell behind on my challenge between the crazy months of March and April. Ugh, do I want to read just for the sake of catching up?

2. I have some big books I really wanted to read this year. Namely, Far From the Madding Crowd and The Outlander series, all big books! The bigger the books, most likely, the fewer you end up reading. And that's not good for a reading challenge based on number of books read. Besides, reading the whole Outlander series in two or so months would be an accomplishment in itself!

3. My friends. I have a few close friends who find themselves in a tight spot right now, specifically in the next few months. A couple of them will have a more stressful and tiring summer than usual due to circumstances or changes in their lives, while another friend will be fighting for his life. The school year restricts not only my daily time, but also my time outside of school with planning, grading, and attending activities (my students' and my kids'). Summertime is free time for me and it is the only time I can be at the beck and call of those who need me. Also, there are my other obligations, like the day-to-day time with my kids and some family events we have planned. 

Obviously, the last reason is the one that sealed the deal. With the addition of each person I felt I needed to be there for, it became abundantly clear the reading goal would have to go. I know it's the right thing to do because I feel completely at ease about it. But you better believe I'll still be reading - it will help keep me sane - and the blog will keep going strong.

Have you ever decided to give up something you love or enjoy because something more important came along? 

Begin the Week with Words

Quotes on friends and friendship struck me this past week...thought it was a weird coincidence, except I don't believe in coincidence. Here are a few I liked:

Source: http://sayingimages.com/

Source: http://love.catchsmile.com/

Source: http://qsayings.blogspot.com/